Shed a few tears awhile ago when I read the card Daddy sent for my bday.
It read:
Kaps,
Happy_Birthday_!
to us, today s perhaps one of ur most significant bday bcos at least we cud still claim u to be ours. but the preservation of d human specie must not be broken hence im looking forward to a more significant event in ur life come october. im right here behind u. i love u pangga.
It made me realize for a moment that my family recognizes how important this event is to me. Although I know that when my dad sends me stuff like this, the reality it's just him telling me this and not him representing the whole family. For a moment, it made me feel good. The tears were actually tears of joy.
But then reality comes biting again. And the thought that my mom, my youngest sister and me are still not in good terms come rushing back. It's a very sad feeling. Something that I really do not wish to dwell on any longer.
But despite all of these, my bday was a happy one. I received tons of greetings as compared to several bdays in the past. It felt good to be remembered by friends especially good old friends from UP.
Today, I vow to let go of the bitterness. I will let time fix whatever issues exist at present. If time cannot handle it...I know love will not let this go unrepaired. Tibs and Auntie Jingjing are there to help me do that. And I thank God everyday I have people like them to help me get through all this.
To Mommy and Maoche, this may be something you can never and will never relate to. This could be something you think is just a whim of mine. But someday, I know...you will understand. And time will come you will remember there were happy days shared with me. That there came a time you were the number one priority in my list. I will wait for you to remember.
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