Protected by Copyscape Plagiarism Checker

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Nanny Heartbreak

Nanny problems are not new to me. I have actually gone through a lot since I got pregnant but I do not know why each time I come across another nanny problem, I always get all emotional and stressed out. 

As full-time working-out-of-the home parents, we are very dependent on the caregiver-nanny-yaya-whatever-you-may-call-it that we get for our daughter. When we screen we try to make sure that their personality suits that of our daughter. We try to make sure as well that regardless of their age they can easily follow our instructions and that they understand that WE are the parents and that we always make the call when it comes to our daughter. But apart from that, what we try to make sure when we interview is that they are the type who could stay long with an employer. And usually, at the onset, they do appear passionate with taking care of the kid. They listen to and follow instructions well. They're easy to deal with. 

Fast forward however to (let's see, I've almost lost count) the 6th nanny and we're still searching for the ONE. The last nanny that left us had an impressive record of a 7-year stay with previous employer with whom she was never granted vacation days. With us she was entitled to a 2-week vacation with pay, bonuses and Philhealth but when she went home to Antique for a supposedly one-week vacation (she was with us for 6 months) she decided not to come back citing domestic problems as a reason. This last one really broke my heart. I always thought that goodness only leads to goodness. Love begets love. And I tried to show her nothing but goodness. Maia loved her dearly despite several quirks that I personally would have had difficulty living with (if not for Maia). I wonder now if I shouldn't have been extra nice with her and instead followed the previous employer's strategy, would she still be with us?

You know how it's like when a boyfriend who you think was already the ONE suddenly breaks up with you? That's how I feel like at this moment. Tibs is having difficulty understanding that but he will have to live with this for a while.

How do I exactly find the perfect nanny? Does she exist? And what should one do to keep them from leaving? Apart from the compensation, the benefits/perks, the household treatment, what else? My daughter is almost the perfect  ward. She's at this age where she loves to point out to people that she's already grown up and that she can take care of herself. She's very independent. She knows how to entertain herself, feed herself, even make her own milk. She's careful with fragile things.  She cleans up her mess (i mean literally, by the way). She's not a handful to take care of because she rarely throws tantrums around people she considers 'friends'. She likes to throw tantrums though when she's sure mom and dad is around. But never with 'other' people. So I ask, why would they ever think of leaving her?

I'm really heartbroken right now. But I know this will come to pass. For the meantime, I will have to fake a smile and try my hardest to be cheery because the little girl is already looking forward to spending a wonderful weekend with her mom and dad. Sigh.


  1. I feel for you. As a mom, I always have problems with my kids' care-givers. Just last year, I realized that the yayas I am extra-nice to, the ones I treat like family, the ones I showered with perks and gifts are the ones who leave. I noticed that the ones I dealt with, strictly and straigh-forwardly, were the ones who stayed longer.

    Ayaw siguro nila ng mabait. Gusto nila, feel nila un difference in status: Amo ka, helper ako.

    Good luck sa atin.

    1. Thank you Cathy. You're right, it's probably high time for me to change the way I manage our helpers. Hindi siguro maiiwasan maattach but I guess if you show them who the boss is, they'd probably show more respect too.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...